Questions. Answers. Woody.

Last night was one of these really fun nights that reminds you what a super town this New York City place can really be.

Things started off on a scholarly note when- against all likelihood- I gave a lecture of sorts to a writing class at Fordham University (my alma mater) at Lincoln Center. I hardly think I’m qualified to be giving advice of any sort on the subject of writing to impressionable young people (or anyone really), but Fordham offered me money and free pizza to do it so I was all like “Yes- I will totally show up at your school and do that.” In the interest of full disclosure, I should also point out that my sister, a much better and more succesful writer than I, had been asked to speak at the school and then one thing led to another and they ended up wanting me to speak to the young people too.

I had hoped to dig up one of those tweed blazers with the suede patches on the elbows for my lecture last night, but I ended up just wearing what I put on yesterday morning (minus the pith helmet). Also, what with the no-smoking rule they have going at Fordham, the pipe was out of the question too. Despite my lack of professorial attire, however, things seemed to go okay. The actual professor of the class guided me through things in more of a Q&A sort of way rather than having me just stand up and lecture everybody all by myself, which was good because I hadn’t really prepared anything beyond a couple notes I had scribbled about “following your dreams” while on the subway up to Fordham.

I couldn’t really tell if the kids enjoyed or benefited from my “lecture” in any way (one student seemed to be smiling a lot, but maybe my fly was down or something), but I had a good time and they seemed like a real nice bunch. Now if my high school calls me to come speak there sometime I will have officially realized all my dreams in life (assuming I get the pet donkey for Christmas as promised).

After I finished forming young minds and touching the youth of America in general, I ran over to Alice Tully Hall at Lincoln Center to watch and listen to a Q&A session with Woody Allen. It was interesting to go from participating in a Q&A session and then going to watch a Q&A session right afterwards. Overall, I’d say Woody did a better job than I did but there were better snacks at my thing. This was actually the second time I’ve seen Woody Allen be interviewed in front of an audience (I saw him a couple years ago at the 92nd St. Y speaking on the role of psychotherapy in his films) and he was much more forthcoming this time around, perhaps because last night’s interviewer seemed to have a better handle on things.

Woody answered questions for about an hour and then there was a screening of his new movie “Match Point,” starring Hollywood’s Scarlett Johansson and the guy from “Bend It Like Beckham.” I thought the movie was pretty good, but my friend Fred and the other people we were with (one of whom was a massage therapist who also specialized in something called “guided imagery,” which sounded pretty sweet but I imagine must be expensive in addition to being potentially creepy) weren’t that into it. While I agree with them that the movie wasn’t that great compared to most of Woody’s other movies, it still kicked the crap out of 99.9% of all the other movies people make these days. But hey, that’s just me. I’m easy. Keep Ben Affleck off the screen, throw in a sex scene or two and you can have my ten bucks any time.

After the Woody Allen extravaganza, we all walked over to a restaurant called either O’Neill’s or O’Neal’s (I forget which), where I ate a hamburger and drank a couple beers because the people in the movie kept drinking beer and it looked really good. And it was! Then I shared a cab home with Fred and some of my new friends.

When I got back to Brooklyn I finished off a pint of my new favorite ice cream, Chocolate Peanut Butter made by the Haagen-Dazs people. It’s kind of like Chubby Hubby by the Ben and Jerry’s people but a bit more streamlined and not as crunchy because it doesn’t have the pretzels in it. Whether you really like ice cream or simply would like to put on a few extra pounds this holiday season, I highly recommend it.

Dave Hill