Miami, Peaches, And Stuff Like That

I have been in scenic Miami Beach for a few days now to continue shooting my soon-to-be wildly popular program “The King Of Miami With Dave Hill,” which will air this spring on the futuristic high-definition network INHD, the people who bring you Howard Stern On Demand and other programs made available in the unstoppable high-definition television format. As you can probably imagine, I am pretty much ruling the fuck out of this place as usual, as suggested in the photo above. That is me on a Segway, the incredible machine that makes actually walking a thing of the past. Finally! I am so tired of actually have to do anything. In the future, we will all exist in a vegetative state and it will be awesome. Hopefully we will also be wearing really tight silver suits. Until then, I will continue to look incredible in any number of my unstoppable outfits.

I have been doing all sorts of life-altering things here in Miami. Yesterday, for example, I went golfing at the Doral Country Club, which was quite nice. I had not been golfing since I was fourteen. It was really great to get back out on the course again. That is a picture of me about to go golfing above. As an interesting bit of trivia, the sweater I am wearing is from the Jack Nicklaus collection made by Revere Sportswear, a company that my grandfather used to sell unstoppable outfits for a long, long time ago. The sweater was ordered for me for the shoot and when I saw the label I knew that I was fulfilling some sort of prophecy or another. I can’t help but think my grandfather was looking down on me and thinking that his grandson has grown up to be just as much of a jackass as I was when he died over twenty years ago. Still, I think my grandfather and I can both agree that I look pretty great in that sweater. Thanks, grandpa- I miss you. Now please send more outfits!

After a long day of showbiz magic, I hit the town for a bit of hijinks. One thing led to another and next thing I know I was standing on the beach with my friend Phil watching Peaches play a free concert about fifty yards from the ocean. That is a picture I took with my cellphone above. Yes, I know I am incredible cell phone photographer. Anyway, I have to say that Peaches was fucking awesome. It was the most entertaining and inspiring show I have seen in a long, long time, which is a lot coming from someone like me, who rocks like a motherfucker without even thinking about it. Peaches ended her show by stripping naked and running into the water as a thousand people followed her out to the ocean. I have a new hero. I wish I could see her and her band every night.

Okay, time to hit the showers. More on this and other topics in the near future.

Dave Hill